


Return to Me

by Estalfaed



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Gay Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Reaper War, Recovery, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-12 12:51:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13547694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Estalfaed/pseuds/Estalfaed





	Return to Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Derog6](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Derog6/gifts).



**To Shiplord - May a new year bring new experiences and new possibilities**

\------------------

In Kaidan’s dreams he’s the one that finds Shepard. He’s not digging through the rubble or screaming out his name, no. Kaidan is drawn to Shepard by something profound, bigger and beyond him. Be that true love, destiny, fate, the will of god or the universe. Maybe it’s as simple – or as powerful – as a promise. Someone waiting for him to show up, someone fighting like hell to be reunited again.

In Kaidan’s dreams he finds him, so beautifully alive, waiting. Always waiting.

Reality is always there when he wakes up. In reality Kaidan was not the one to find Shepard. No. He was stuck on some god forsaken planet in some god forsaken system, bum leg and broken ship, when Shepard was found.

Half dead and half buried, but somehow, alive.

So it was that when the Normandy finally limped home, finally reached communication range, and finally received news that their beloved commander was alive, Kaidan found himself on the first shuttle he could get his hands on.

He charged into the hospital where Shepard was located and had been there ever since, patiently waiting for the love of his life to wake up. He whiled away his days working to help with the clean up going on around him, using his biotics to lift objects that would normally take dozens of men to clear, but never straying far from the hospital. The nurses were familiar with his face and had even taken to sending him periodic updates on Shepard’s status via local omni-tool communication. If only to stop him from calling every half hour.

It was one thing to find out that Shepard hadn’t died in the explosion of the crucible, it was another to see him tied up to all those tubes, skin grafts and sutures covering his body. That gorgeous spiky hair that Kaidan had loved to run his hands through was gone, burned away in the flames, and the blue eyes which had seemed to shine remained ever closed.

The steady beat of the machines keeping Shepard breathing, keeping him alive were the sounds that lulled Kaidan to sleep and what he woke to in the morning. They were a comfort; they were maddening. Still he stayed at Shepard’s side, holding the one good hand that wasn’t covered in bandages, whispering soft words. He would even break out into one of the lullabies he used sing to Ethan when the infiltrator struggled to sleep, just the deep blue glow of the fish tank and Kaidan’s husky baritone to help him find rest.

So Kaidan worked, Kaidan waited, Kaidan kept faith that his vigil would be rewarded.

After all, Shepard had promised.

\-----

It was a month before Ethan opened his eyes the first time. A month of Kaidan’s endless waiting, five months since the Reaper War was finished. Five whole months before the man who had been willing to give everything to end the slaughter was able to see the fruits of his labor.

He awoke to a gentle humming, a soft husky voice filling the empty air, the tune stirring him to wakefulness. Shepard had been chasing that song in the darkness for what felt like forever. Endless moments suspended in nothing, no thoughts, no distinction, until that song illuminated, gave form, gave thought, gave sense of self. When that song was sung, he was Shepard, and he chased it until finally, he awoke.

At first, he couldn’t see, the gentle light that filtered through the shades almost too much for his eyes to bear. Everything was fuzzy and out of focus, but eventually he made out a familiar form, felt the callous battle worn hand repeatedly rubbing a circle in his own. It took all of his strength, every ounce of his will to tighten his grip, heart monitors beeping wildly. The song broke off abruptly as Kaidan jumped up from his seat and crouched over Shepard.

“Ethan? Oh my god, E-Ethan.” A brilliant smile lit up his face and Shepard tried to mirror it, tried to speak, but only a croak escaped his lips and his face felt tight, unused muscles resisting unfamiliar movements. “You came back to me.”

He lifted a shaky hand to Kaidan’s face, clumsily wiped tears away from the biotics cheeks. It was all he could manage. Exhausted he dropped his hand and his eyes fluttered shut. But it wasn’t the darkness that waited for him as he drifted; it was the warmth of dreams and memories of time spent with Kaidan,. t was comfort and true rest. He could finally begin the processing of healing, mentally as well as physically.

Shepard was dimly aware of Kaidan calling for the nurse or the doctor, anyone. It was faded background noise. There was relief, joy, and gratefulness resting in his chest. Kaidan had made it, Kaidan was alive and with him. They made it. They had all the time in the world now. He slept with a smile.

\-----

It’s almost another while month before Shepard is able to feed himself and move around on the bed comfortably. They keep themselves occupied during the recovery. Kaidan read or sang to Shepard while he worked his physical therapy, each victory celebrated, each victory earned by painstaking effort that left Ethan exhausted. It was slow going and that frustrated him to no end. He was Commander-fucking-Shepard.

Of course, the doctors all told him his progress was remarkable, and Kaidan always had words of encouragement or praise, yet being waited on hand and foot was stifling. Finally being able to feed himself was a blessed relief. Though he would miss the way Kaidan would give him a kiss after each spoonful of green mush he swallowed down.

Maybe they could keep that part going.

He cleared his throat to interrupt Kaidan’s reading, who shot him a questioning glance, and very slowly, without breaking eye contact, brought the spoon to his lips, and swallowed the protein supplement with barely a shudder. He licked his lips with exaggerated slowness and smirked when Kaidan’s face flushed, eyes following the movements of his tongue.

Kaidan chuckled softly and leaned in for a quick kiss that ended all too soon. Ethan suppressed a huff of annoyance at his lack of progress. He missed Kaidan, and sure the man was there with him in the room, but he missed being able to hold him. He missed being able to lay down and make out with his lover, that sense of connectedness that didn’t have to be about sex, not that he would ever turn that down – sex with Kaidan was amazing. It was that physical touch that he was starved for. The hospital bed was not made for two and the last time he had convinced Kaidan to crawl up in it with him, he had pulled a few stitches and his IV had come loose. The nurse had chewed both their ears off, but it had been worth it, even if they had only gotten a moment together.

Patience they said, everything would come back with time. The prognosis was good. The implants he had been given by Cerberus were still functioning and doing their jobs, probably the only reason he had lived.

Kaidan continued reading aloud, some nonsense book that had randomly shown up in his room one day. He listened to that beautiful voice and dutifully ate his mush.

\-----

“…and you’re sure no one else came in while I was gone?”

“No sir. Shepard has been under constant monitoring, not to mention aside from Hackett, you’re the only one who has been cleared to visit. We would know if someone else came in.”

Kaidan scratched his head and pulled out the book that had been laying by Shepard’s bedside table when he came back. Ethan had been sleeping peacefully and the biotic had to report in, still trying to help with the restoration efforts. More comfortable with leaving Shepard now that the man was doing so much better.

“Look, this is the fourth book that has just shown up out of the blue.” It was a beautiful leather-bound copy of The Hobbit, rare and no doubt expensive. “Not to mention once we finish reading them, they disappear again.”

The nurse shrugged helplessly. “I’m sorry sir, but we can’t explain how they got there either.”

Frowning again, Kaidan sighed and set the book aside. “Maybe we could install security cameras? Have some sort of extra security measure? I mean they’re only books but…I don’t feel comfortable about someone sneaking in here while I’m gone and Shepard’s asleep.”

“I’ll bring it up to the head physician. I’m sure that’s something we could do.”

“Ok, thanks.”

He turned to face Ethan, who was watching the construction efforts through the window, blue eyes seeming to capture the light and glimmer with it. There was a gentle smile on his face that made Kaidan’s knees weak and his heart flutter.

“I don’t think I want cameras Kaidan.” The younger man said as he turned from the window. “How will we ever manage to have a moment alone if there are cameras watching us?”

Kaidan snorted a laugh and shook his head. “I think we’re still a while off from _private moments_ Shep.”

The younger man gave him a lecherous grin and lifted his hands in a childish grabby motion. “I have full functionality of both hands and my mouth. I think I could show you a good time if you’d only let me.”

“Har har.” The biotic snickered at Shepard’s disappointed huff, returning to his seat by the bed. Book once more in hand he opened it and ran his fingers across the soft leather. “Who do you think keeps leaving these for us?”

Shepard shrugged distractedly, chewing on his bottom lip. “I think I have an idea, but it seems kinda outlandish.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Mm-hmm.” Shepard focused his gaze on Kaidan and smirked. “Invisible, sneaking in and out of not only my room but the hospital undetected. Leaving and taking things without anyone noticing? Sound like someone we know?”

Kaidan frowned and thought a moment. “Uhh…wait really? Kasumi?”

Shepard nodded, “Kasumi.”

The next book came just as mysteriously as the last few, but this time, when Kaidan opened the cover, a small photo fell out. A hastily snapped selfie, Kasumi standing over a sleeping Shepard, bunny ears behind his head, making a kissy face to the camera. A note was written on the back of the photo with an elegant swirl. “Caught me.”

\-----

He took one step after another, slowly making his way across the room. Each step a matter of pride, a small victory. Ethan had eyes for no one else but Kaidan. The man had a beautiful smile on his face, dazzling in its simplicity, and all the motivation he needed to keep going.

When he finally reached the other man, he was rewarded with a crushing hug and a breathless kiss.

As he lost himself to the feel of the other man against him, opening up to Kaidan and deepening their kiss, the aches and pains faded to the background. Muted compared to the fire in his veins and the desire in his groin. He rubbed his hard on against the Major’s thigh, eliciting a groan from the other man and reached over to cup Kaidan’s dick through his fatigues. It was hard too and he gave it a squeeze, eliciting another groan, this time longer and deeper.

His physical therapist cleared her throat, shuffling awkwardly where she stood, face flushed. It was enough to bring them both back to their senses. Kaidan’s face was as red as the therapists.

Ethan sniggered. Worth it.

\-----

They threw one hell of a party when Shepard was released from the hospital. There really was nothing else like getting the Normandy crew together for food and booze. Add celebrating Shepard’s recovery and coming home party? Things got down right excessive.

Kaidan had been sneakily planning the event for weeks, giving everyone ample time to make their way to Earth. Liara had been focusing her efforts on repairing her shadow broker network, which could be done anywhere, so she chose to stay on Earth and be on hand if Shepard needed anything. She had also helped Kaidan find a place near Vancouver that hadn’t been destroyed by the Reapers. Someplace he could call home, and if Ethan wanted, a place they could call home together.

It hadn’t been easy coordinating all of that, the house itself was decent sized, four bedrooms, two and a half baths, all on one floor. That of course would not be nearly enough space to house a party for the crew, but the property had quite a few acres, fifty in fact. Plenty of room to spread out a bunch of tables, put a few grills side to side, and throw a good old fashioned cookout.

The tables were laden with booze of all kinds, some in coolers, others served room temp. A completely separate table labeled for the dextro guests was set up with its own booze and food. All in all, it was a wild party. EDI had managed to boost the signal on the Normandy so her mobile platform could visit as well, offering to be the DJ for evening. After a few rather old-fashioned picks that killed the mood, James promptly took over.

There was dancing and laughter and through it all Shepard was the life of the party, the source of constant attention. He still tired easily and was often found sitting in some chair or another, engaged in quiet conversation or sipping lightly from his lager. Kaidan would linger at his side before Shepard would shoo him away, only to have to repeat the process later. Ethan loved him for it of course, but damn the man could hover like a mother hen.

When he finally felt up to it, Shepard led Kaidan to the dance floor and James queued up a love song they could dance to, slow and steady. The biotic melted into his arms and he was proud that he could hold him.

They danced to a few more songs before finally begging off, feigning exhaustion, to sneak back into the house. The party raged long into the night.

\-----

Kaidan lay naked and spread out before him, his dick resting hard and heavy against his stomach, breathing hitched from anticipation. Shepard knelt between his legs and took a moment to admire his lover, it had been so long since they could do this. There were a few new scars that he had never seen before, so he mapped them with soft kisses before claiming Kaidan’s lips with his own. While they kissed he slowly rutted their hips together, languid movements, hard dicks rubbing against each other. He swallowed Kaidan’s moans when he gripped both of them and started jacking them off to the rhythm of their hips.

It could only last so long though. It had just been too long for both of them. He pulled back to catch his breath and drank in the sight of Kaidan, flushed and breathless, head rolled back and chest heaving. Shepard would never tire of it.

He knelt back down and took Kaidan’s dick in his mouth, running his tongue on the underside of the head, teasing out a muffled curse from the other man. Ethan hummed his approval as he swallowed down, taking as much of Kaidan into his mouth as he could, only managing about half.

Damn. He knew he could do better. Pulling back, he grasped the biotics dick with one hand to stroke it slowly while he fingered the man’s hole. Shepard hadn’t been cleared for anal, and what an uncomfortable conversation with the doc that had been. But Kaidan was more than happy to oblige, neither of them really having a preferred position. Sex with Kaidan was amazing whatever they did.

Kaidan groaned as Shepard teased him, arching his hips before regaining some semblance of control. He grabbed the bottle of lube he bought in anticipation for tonight. They had both agreed that hasty hand jobs in the hospital were fun and all, but tonight Kaidan wanted Shepard, all of him.

Ethan lubed up a finger and put a generous amount on Kaidan’s dick, keeping his stroking slow and even as he carefully loosened him up. It wasn’t long before he had two fingers pistoning into his lover, while the man squirmed and shuddered under his ministrations.

“S-stop!” Kaidan let out a breathless cry and Shepard stopped jacking him off. Kaidan chuckled and shook his head. “I didn’t w-want it to be over.”

“You want to come while I’m fucking you, Kaidan?”

His lover groaned loudly. “Y-yeah Shepard, I want to come with you inside me. I’m ready.”

Shepard was rock hard as he took in Kaidan’s trembling form, he had done that. Knowing he was able to undo the major’s stoic control, _fuck_ it was hot. He lubed up his dick and lined it with Kaidan’s hole, pressing in slow and steady, pausing to allow Kaidan to adjust before sinking in a bit deeper. He hissed out a breath as that tight heat engulfed him, whimpered as he sunk all the way in. Kaidan growled and yanked his head down for a sloppy kiss. He nearly came right then.

“F-fuck, Kaidan you’re so damn hot.”

“Shepard, please.”

He needed no further encouragement, pulling all the way out before slamming back in. He grunted at the way Kaidan curled around him, grasping at his hair, twisting a nipple, hands never resting, ever roaming as he slammed into him. They fit so well together, had found each other again after so many things had tried to keep them apart.

Kaidan let out a tiny gasp each time he pounded into him. It drove Shepard wild and only spurred him on to fuck him harder, fuck him faster, till they were both moaning and panting with every thrust. Kaidan came first, his biotics sparking around them both. His lover’s loud cry and the tightening around his dick sent him over the edge seconds later.

Ethan collapsed on top of Kaidan and lay there, attempting to catch his breath while he basked in the afterglow of his orgasm. He felt the frantic beating of the biotics heart. It matched his own, and he nuzzled into the space where shoulder met neck, planting a sloppy kiss there.

“Wow.” Kaidan said, breathless and loud in the now silent room.

“Y-yeah.”

“I mean, really. Wow.”

Laughed bubbled up from the man and he wrapped strong arms around Shepard’s back, pulling him close and tight.

“I want to do that again.”

Shepard kissed his neck again before pulling back to look at the older man. “Oh yeah?”

“Mmhmm.” The biotic nodded. “Maybe not tonight, but tomorrow morning?”

He could only nod his agreement. “Yeah, morning sex. That sounds great.”

Finally, soft enough, he slid out of Kaidan, both of them groaning as over sensitive nerves sparked. That set off another round of laughter from the biotic, this time he joined him. He pinned his lover down with a round of kisses before murmuring softly “I love you, Kaidan.”

“M-mm” Kaidan nodded, eyes heavy with post orgasm sleepiness, “Love you too Ethan. More than anything.”


End file.
